It's Monday again, John and I are looking at another full week of work, cleaning, bible study, etc. I believe John was feeling a little overwhelmed last night as he realized he has a paper due on Tuesday, and we have work tonight. Mondays and Wednesday are long for him, as he goes from school to tutoring to cleaning with me. But, Lord willing, these jobs will end mid-June. God has used it to graciously provide for my need, and give just an extra boost. But it's really wearing on me. I feel like there's so much I should be doing for the wedding, but can't think of what-because I'm working most evenings. Physically, I have more endurance than I did a year ago, now that I'm healthier, but it still wipes me out. But God gives grace, and every day that we clean I'm learning true thankfulness!
Saturday we had engagement pics done, that was so much fun. Only took about an hour and a half, and we got some great stuff. I think I've pretty much decided which one we will use for the invitations, and which ones to print and frame, etc. I'm also going to print off a bunch of my favorites, along with pictures from our actual engagement and scrapbook them....in my spare time??
Sunday was a busy day, running around looking for ties for the groomsmen. We found a couple that would have been perfect, but as they were on sale, there were only two of them...and we needed seven. Oh well, we don't need them until July. And God provides in astounding ways sometimes. I love that about Him! I love to watch Him provide in a way I never expected. And it humbles me when He provides for a need I didn't know I had, or didn't think to talk to Him about.
John and I met up with Anna and Stephen at DB, so Anna could find a dress and get it ordered. After trying on several, I think she narrowed it down to two, and actually was quite sure which one to get. But she needed some more time to think on it;)
We had to rush off to get to church for our first marriage counseling session. I'm so thankful that God put Pastor Barney here, and I'm thankful for the ministry he has been to John. It's been such a blessing for him to hear PB's heart on his ministry in the church, and what God could potentially do at HP. When PB asked what we were expecting from our counseling, we both kind of laughed...we've never done this before, so we're not totally sure what to expect. But I told PB that I didn't care about issues like how to squeeze a tube of toothpaste, or which way the toilet paper goes. Those things have never been an issue-probably because I had four other siblings that I shared a bathroom and toothpaste with;) I wanted to know the tough stuff: how to biblically deal with sin in my spouse, and how to differentiate between actual sin issues that need to be addressed and my own injured pride! I'm excited about the work we have to do, working through theology and worship practices. Those are things I am pretty sure we are united on, but we will see. This kind of quality time is my favorite. I love having specific things to talk through with John;thus far, I have seen that his standards/beliefs are based solely on what he has read in God's Word.. So even if I disagreed, I couldn't disagree long, once I read the scriptures for myself!
I think I had underestimated my role as a "helpmeet", PB said that I would be John's main source of sanctification, as I will know him and his faults better than anyone-so then how do I point him to Christ and his gospel? How will I do that without stepping into spiritual leadership?
John will surely be learning quite a few of my flaws as we begin working through these things together. He told PB that one of the things that drew him to me, was my servant's attitude, and it was one of the areas in which we serve God better together. He said that my servant's spirit has enabled him to work more effectively for the sake of the gospel. But I know that- as much as I desire my motives for service to be purely for the glory of God, and helping the gospel-that's not always the case! Sometimes I weary in well-doing, wondering if my service is even noticed, if I'm even being effective in my ministry. I'm amazed at how many different ways my pride shows itself. I'm looking forward to seeing more ways in which my pride manifests itself, and by God's grace, putting that pride to death, so I can learn how to "help" John:)
So, one meeting with Pastor Barney, and I highly recommend him for counseling. This is going to be tough, intense, unpleasant and very necessary. I'm sure, by God's grace, this will be the most beneficial thing we are doing to prepare for our marriage.
Monday, April 19, 2010
Friday, April 16, 2010
Latest news
Well, it's been a while. My computer had not been able to connect to the local wireless, and my housemate's computer crashed. After about a half hour of fiddling with my computer, I was able to get it back on the web:) In all reality, it was probably something that would take an tech guy 2 seconds, but I'm enjoying a sense of accomplishment!
Aaron was so helpful in our meeting. I had given him a basic idea of what I wanted, and he made it happen. This past week he put together about 13 different font ideas, and we chose one that needed just a little alteration. He has been very gracious and patient:) This Saturday John and I are having engagement pictures done by John's brother-in-law, Jon Schuler. Hopefully the weather will cooperate and I will be able to communicate what I am looking for as far as the photos are concerned. Once that is done, I can choose a picture for the invitations and send it over to Aaron. I'm using an idea my friend Michelle Dietrich used. The invitation will be a picture of us printed on card stock, with a piece of white vellum paper over it. The invitation details will be printed on the vellum paper, and the two pieces will be attached with a form of baling twine. The font is both rustic and elegant, which the overall theme of the wedding itself. I'm very pleased with what we have so far, and can't wait to order the finished product!
This week has been rather full of change; John started cleaning with me, instead of my momma. God has so richly blessed my daddy with work that Momma was only cleaning to help me out. Now I'm getting 100% of what we make-which is mere pennies for the amount of work it is. But God has graciously provided. Right now, it's just enough extra to make my financial situation a lot easier, and there will be extra for paint, and maybe a couple small things. ..like materials to make a headboard for our master bedroom. I do, however, look forward to the time when John starts evening summer class and we have to give it up. It's very time consuming. Three nights a week are automatically gone. Fortunately, now that John is working with me, I have a little less to pack into a full day. We aren't able to spend a ton of real quality time together, but I feel less badly about going home shortly after we finish work.
Bridesmaid shoes are another task I have to tackle pretty quickly. I think I know what I'm looking for, and where to get them fairly cheaply. But the shoes only come in white or black, and I would like Ivory. So I'm going to buy a pair and try to stain them with coffee or brown shoe polish...We'll see how that goes:)
I met with Evans Robinson last Saturday during the LBB conference at HP, and we were able to figure a general direction for the bridesmaid bouquets, and he was able to make mine. I'm very pleased with his work, and very thankful for his desire to do this as a gift for us! We also have all the flowers for corsages and boutonnieres, and the half the materials for the grapevine ball topiaries flanking the arbor that John and Adam Schaffer are going to make. I still haven't decided whether or not I want an aisle runner....I'm thinking not as it's just another added expense. The floor will be clean, and there will be silk rose petals scattered. That's good enough, I think.
I made a kitchen organization plan the other day..Monday, I think. What's going to go in each cupboard and drawer, etc. My sweet soon-to-be-husband...when I told him, he looked generally confused. He stated that he didn't realize that needed to be thought through and planned. I reassured him that there are probably very few people who are that OCD, and reminded him of my delight in the cleaning product aisles to prove my point. But he will appreciate it someday!
I suppose I should go make good use of my partial day off by going to buy cleaning supplies for work tonight and set about purchasing and staining shoes:) I'll let you know how that turns out.
Aaron was so helpful in our meeting. I had given him a basic idea of what I wanted, and he made it happen. This past week he put together about 13 different font ideas, and we chose one that needed just a little alteration. He has been very gracious and patient:) This Saturday John and I are having engagement pictures done by John's brother-in-law, Jon Schuler. Hopefully the weather will cooperate and I will be able to communicate what I am looking for as far as the photos are concerned. Once that is done, I can choose a picture for the invitations and send it over to Aaron. I'm using an idea my friend Michelle Dietrich used. The invitation will be a picture of us printed on card stock, with a piece of white vellum paper over it. The invitation details will be printed on the vellum paper, and the two pieces will be attached with a form of baling twine. The font is both rustic and elegant, which the overall theme of the wedding itself. I'm very pleased with what we have so far, and can't wait to order the finished product!
This week has been rather full of change; John started cleaning with me, instead of my momma. God has so richly blessed my daddy with work that Momma was only cleaning to help me out. Now I'm getting 100% of what we make-which is mere pennies for the amount of work it is. But God has graciously provided. Right now, it's just enough extra to make my financial situation a lot easier, and there will be extra for paint, and maybe a couple small things. ..like materials to make a headboard for our master bedroom. I do, however, look forward to the time when John starts evening summer class and we have to give it up. It's very time consuming. Three nights a week are automatically gone. Fortunately, now that John is working with me, I have a little less to pack into a full day. We aren't able to spend a ton of real quality time together, but I feel less badly about going home shortly after we finish work.
Bridesmaid shoes are another task I have to tackle pretty quickly. I think I know what I'm looking for, and where to get them fairly cheaply. But the shoes only come in white or black, and I would like Ivory. So I'm going to buy a pair and try to stain them with coffee or brown shoe polish...We'll see how that goes:)
I met with Evans Robinson last Saturday during the LBB conference at HP, and we were able to figure a general direction for the bridesmaid bouquets, and he was able to make mine. I'm very pleased with his work, and very thankful for his desire to do this as a gift for us! We also have all the flowers for corsages and boutonnieres, and the half the materials for the grapevine ball topiaries flanking the arbor that John and Adam Schaffer are going to make. I still haven't decided whether or not I want an aisle runner....I'm thinking not as it's just another added expense. The floor will be clean, and there will be silk rose petals scattered. That's good enough, I think.
I made a kitchen organization plan the other day..Monday, I think. What's going to go in each cupboard and drawer, etc. My sweet soon-to-be-husband...when I told him, he looked generally confused. He stated that he didn't realize that needed to be thought through and planned. I reassured him that there are probably very few people who are that OCD, and reminded him of my delight in the cleaning product aisles to prove my point. But he will appreciate it someday!
I suppose I should go make good use of my partial day off by going to buy cleaning supplies for work tonight and set about purchasing and staining shoes:) I'll let you know how that turns out.
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Guest list and Bridal showers....
In a word:YUCK! My honey tells me this is the worst part...so he has heard:) Adding in all the people that are MUST be invited, and trying to find comfort in that fact that only about 1/2 will even come. Then to separate the out-of-towners who won't be around for a bridal shower from those who will, and find a place big enough to hold them all. I have decided it's the most awkward thing in the world to ask someone to throw you a party in their home. Fortunately there are people in our church who have volunteered their homes for just such a thing..
We have registered at Bed Bath and Beyond-I may have already mentioned that. Tonight we sat down with John's parents and worked through the guest list. We deleted a lot of names and added a bunch to the list.
Music list and rough draft of order of service is done. We've decided on musicians, and have talked with a few of them. We decided that we really would like the wedding party to just be in the wedding and be there for pictures, and not have any other responsibilities. So Ben, Aaron and Sam are excluded for being involved with music. We are having only male vocalists. John won't let me sing in our wedding, and I don't know any female vocalists who's voices lend themselves to a more contemporary style of music. Oh well:) I like male vocalists better anyway.
My to-do list for tomorrow is only about a mile long, to be done before work at night: Clean John's house for Bible study on Tuesday night, look for ballet slippers, find flowers for boutonnieres and corsages for Groomsmen and mothers/grandmothers/great-grandmother,meet Aaron for lunch at Panera to discuss invitations and wedding programs, go to the bank and pay Momma, pay bills with a thankful attitude that God has provided the means to fulfill my responsibilities :)
This morning I went to the ICM service with John, and went to my Momma's class and met her kids. Then I hopped on the bus and met a little boy named Antionne. He's a sweet little first grader, a little bitty boy. He came and sat next to me and showed his Sunday school paper. He kept scooting closer and closer, so I said "hey, you wanna sit on my lap so you can look out the window??" And he said " yeah, OK" So we talked about fire trucks and motorcycles for a minute, then he shivered and said he was cold. So I wrapped him up in my sweater and pulled him close. And he turned in my lap and just snuggled into my shoulder. I sang to him all the way to his house, and when we got to his stop, he said " I gotta go now....I love you" and he gave me a kiss on the cheek and skipped off the bus. That boy made me melt right there in my seat. I wanted to take him home with me so badly! So I told John tonight that someday I want to adopt a little african-american baby:) He agrees, but marriage comes first! Anyhoo...to bed with me!
We have registered at Bed Bath and Beyond-I may have already mentioned that. Tonight we sat down with John's parents and worked through the guest list. We deleted a lot of names and added a bunch to the list.
Music list and rough draft of order of service is done. We've decided on musicians, and have talked with a few of them. We decided that we really would like the wedding party to just be in the wedding and be there for pictures, and not have any other responsibilities. So Ben, Aaron and Sam are excluded for being involved with music. We are having only male vocalists. John won't let me sing in our wedding, and I don't know any female vocalists who's voices lend themselves to a more contemporary style of music. Oh well:) I like male vocalists better anyway.
My to-do list for tomorrow is only about a mile long, to be done before work at night: Clean John's house for Bible study on Tuesday night, look for ballet slippers, find flowers for boutonnieres and corsages for Groomsmen and mothers/grandmothers/great-grandmother,meet Aaron for lunch at Panera to discuss invitations and wedding programs, go to the bank and pay Momma, pay bills with a thankful attitude that God has provided the means to fulfill my responsibilities :)
This morning I went to the ICM service with John, and went to my Momma's class and met her kids. Then I hopped on the bus and met a little boy named Antionne. He's a sweet little first grader, a little bitty boy. He came and sat next to me and showed his Sunday school paper. He kept scooting closer and closer, so I said "hey, you wanna sit on my lap so you can look out the window??" And he said " yeah, OK" So we talked about fire trucks and motorcycles for a minute, then he shivered and said he was cold. So I wrapped him up in my sweater and pulled him close. And he turned in my lap and just snuggled into my shoulder. I sang to him all the way to his house, and when we got to his stop, he said " I gotta go now....I love you" and he gave me a kiss on the cheek and skipped off the bus. That boy made me melt right there in my seat. I wanted to take him home with me so badly! So I told John tonight that someday I want to adopt a little african-american baby:) He agrees, but marriage comes first! Anyhoo...to bed with me!
Friday, April 2, 2010
A very Good Friday indeed.
"but He was wounded for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace" That brought MY sinful soul peace " and with his stripes we are healed." Isaiah 53:5
Reading the account of the crucifxion of my Jesus in Luke 23 has always been such a sobering process...I wonder why I don't do it more often. If I read this account every day, would I become calloused to the glorious truth that is there? That Christ willingly gave his life to redeem me? Or would I be so consumed with joy and thankfulness on a daily basis, that my words and actions would be completely different....I would hope for the latter. I would hope that remembering the sacrifice of that day would change my everyday, that all I do would be done to bring glory and joy to this God/man who died to reconcile me to a holy God.
The account of the crucifixion in Matthew 27 is probably my favorite of all gospel accounts,as it gives me the details I treasure most. That Jesus' life was not taken, rather, it was given up. Vs 51 describes the tearing of the veil leading to the Most Holy Place in the temple. Jesus' death opened the path for me to come to God, as he became the highest priest. And I cannot fathom the heartbreak and suffering Jesus endured having lost fellowship with his Father, because of my sin. While I have been redeemed, I have never know perfect fellowship with God. It has ALWAYS been marred by my sin, my pride, my self love; and to be out of fellowship with God (as sinful as I am it happens frequently) is miserable enough for me, how much more so for the beloved Son of God?
" I can't comprehend this fathomless love, gripped and amazed by what you have done. Why would the adored become the despised, to bear all the furious wrath that was mine? How awesome this mystery, of your fathomless love for me."
Sunday is coming, the tomb did not stay full!!
Reading the account of the crucifxion of my Jesus in Luke 23 has always been such a sobering process...I wonder why I don't do it more often. If I read this account every day, would I become calloused to the glorious truth that is there? That Christ willingly gave his life to redeem me? Or would I be so consumed with joy and thankfulness on a daily basis, that my words and actions would be completely different....I would hope for the latter. I would hope that remembering the sacrifice of that day would change my everyday, that all I do would be done to bring glory and joy to this God/man who died to reconcile me to a holy God.
The account of the crucifixion in Matthew 27 is probably my favorite of all gospel accounts,as it gives me the details I treasure most. That Jesus' life was not taken, rather, it was given up. Vs 51 describes the tearing of the veil leading to the Most Holy Place in the temple. Jesus' death opened the path for me to come to God, as he became the highest priest. And I cannot fathom the heartbreak and suffering Jesus endured having lost fellowship with his Father, because of my sin. While I have been redeemed, I have never know perfect fellowship with God. It has ALWAYS been marred by my sin, my pride, my self love; and to be out of fellowship with God (as sinful as I am it happens frequently) is miserable enough for me, how much more so for the beloved Son of God?
" I can't comprehend this fathomless love, gripped and amazed by what you have done. Why would the adored become the despised, to bear all the furious wrath that was mine? How awesome this mystery, of your fathomless love for me."
Sunday is coming, the tomb did not stay full!!
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